Big Babies
by
Kevin Tosca
Kevin Tosca has appeared in five issues of Ethel, a journal and press he can't stop admiring. He lives in Berlin where he edits and designs Sacred Parasite. Find out more at kevintosca.com and sacredparasite.com.
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from Big Babies
“The woods! I said I wish I could give birth to my baby in the woods! I said I wish you’d let me be an animal! I said if this is science you can shove it up your over-educated asses!”
“Thought so.” The sage-femme pressed a button, spoke calmly into the air: “I’m going to need a psychiatrist in here ASAP.”
Leda’s satisfaction, so disappointingly short-lived, became acute fear. “What are you doing? Who the fuck are you talking to?”
“Scratch that,” the sage-femme said, eyeballing her patient. “Level five risk. Cervix favorable. We’re going to induce right now. Get the anesthesiologist ready.”
“Roger that,” a voice replied.
Leda stood up.
“And where, may I ask,” the sage-femme said, “do you think you’re going? Sit down. Relax. We can’t keep taking chances with your doubts and questions and Internet searches. And we certainly can’t keep coddling all that old-timey great-grandma rosy-colored fairy-tale beginning-of-life idealistic hogwash of yours. We’ve got to save you from yourself, Leda. You and your baby. Game over.”